Okay. I owe lots and lots of guestbook entries but if I start on that I'll never manage a proper entry tonight.

But hey, at least you all know I'm not kidnapped...

First I must say something about where we were. Where we were, in fact, was in large part why we went to begin with. It's something else, lemmetellya.

My uncle (father's brother) is the managing director of a place I will not name, but will for the sake of description call Tara. It is partly a wildlife conservatory, part resort, and part arts center, if that makes any sense. My uncle is a big man on the endangered species campus. On Tara there are cheetahs (many), white and black rhinos, tortoises, gazelle, elands, okapi, palm cockatoos, komodo dragons, two very sweet tigers, and more I can't recall. There are also a bunch of houses for guests, and the Lodge, complete with free pool (of the ball kind), free drinks (of all kinds), free gym, free food, free pinball, free bowling alley...um, etc. Barishnykov's dance company is headquartered there.

And I haven't spent more than a couple of hours there since I was 8.

It's basically a paradise. This billionaire, also unnamed, put the place together both to try to help preserve endangered species and to have a (VERY) fancy place to bring his (very exclusive) friends. Clinton has spent time there, and my cousin beat him at golf. Etc.

The animals are -amazing-. As a member of the family, I get to go on feed runs, which is extremely cool. Also the tigers are friendly...they're the same tigers I played with when I was 8 and they were babies. Got to pet them again. Both have been through some really rough times of late, but are happily recovering nicely. They had a scare with the cheetahs and some virus, too, but it looks good for them to start breeding again. There was a baby rhino, which is very hard -- they don't typically breed in captivity. And while I was there a baby roan antelope happened, although he apparently wasn't doing very well.

Everything else is, too. I spent a lot of time shooting pool with Boy and Cousin and Uncle's Wife's In The Closet Sister and her Not-So-In-the-Closet girlfriend. My mom took heavily to the bowling alley. Everyone (except my young cousins) drank a bit too much and ate a bit too much (hell, it's free).

I got to see my two cousins I haven't seen in a very long time, except the younger one at a funeral a couple years back, and he's changed a lot. Had a good time hanging out with both of them. They're sweethearts. The older one, girl, is engaged, and that's a very long story but at least her fiancee seems like a really nice guy.

Periodically I thought about hooking up online but then didn't.

But I think that was a good thing. I really needed a little break, especially after this past month. And my family is, all in all, pretty okay. My aunt is a sweetheart, her husband is fairly bland but he surprises me once in a while, their daughters are cutely their ages (about 11 and 14), my uncle is a strange one and his wife is a little off but both of them were nice enough to feed me and Boy for free for many days. And we all know I adore my little sister.

The drive down was pretty easy, even with Dog and Tiny Marsupial. Uncomfortable, yes, but okay. On the way back we got stuck in a HUGE blizzard in North Carolina (of all places) and wound up spending the night in a motel where Tiny Marsupial escaped *twice* and had to be caught down from the top of the drapes. It took us, all told, from about 10am Wed. to about an hour ago (midnight thursday night) to get home. At least on this leg I got to spend the last few hours in the front since we dropped sister in DC and got a rental car.

(And yes, all you NC-ers, I did think of you between cursing mother nature and her bizarre weather-propelling propensities).

Dog had a *massively* great time. She got to run all over the place, go swimming (she's a terrible swimmer), and hang out with all kinds of people and other dogs. Tiny marsupial did not have such a brilliant time, since his travel cage is highly boring; all his toys stay at home. Dog did embarrass mommy mightily by totally fucking the carpet in our room the first night because she was freaked being in a strange place sans mommy, but happily that was one carpet that was old and hideous (bright green, circa 1973) and was going to be replaced anyway. Still will pay for the damage, of course. And happily also my very first move upon entering the room was to collect all the expensive-looking breakables and stow them away. After that we borrowed a kennel from my uncle and she stayed in that when we were out.

New Year's Eve was fairly anticlimactic but that was okay. Mostly because I was really tired by the time midnight rolled around.

And, hey, golfing fucking HURTS! The putting green was okay, that was fun -- me, Boy, Sister, Sister's Friend -- basically pretending it was miniature golf. Also there was an alligator in the pond and afterwards we went to the clubhouse and grabbed beers. But THEN we went to the driving range and drove balls. Well, they drove balls. I tried, and failed miserably. I am clearly not meant to be a golfer. And when I woke up the next morning my side hurt SO badly from yanking it all out of place in the completely unnatural driving posture. I think I managed to actually make contact with about four out of fifty balls. Ah well, not a big attraction for me there anyway.

Also if you have not been horseback riding since you were eight it really makes your tushie hurt. A lot, and for quite a while. But still I was glad I did it.

Got home and the kitties had not seriously molested anything, Tiny Marsupial was alive and totally delighted to get back to his proper cage, house was not burnt down or robbed, and Dog is happily and very much asleep in her spot on the couch.

Tomorrow have to begin coping with Real Life again, bleah. But in the meantime...working on getting tired enough to go to bed.

So that's all for now. I actually had some individual family member portraits to paint over here, but this is long enough as it is, so I'll get around to that later.

Love and a very happy new year's to you all!

- onehanded